Power of Center

Conflict resolution can be more directly addressed by replacing old destructive behaviors with healthy patterns. Although we will still use more traditional methods to resolve conflict with active listening skills, being heard is not an obligation that can be expected. It is boarding on holding our loved one’s hostage to make it a requirement to be heard. Of course, this is desirable and helpful but the responsibility is still mostly on the person wanting to be heard to be with their feelings in a deeply loving way that takes the responsibility off of others to make us feel heard.

It isn’t easy to break out of the part we play in the family dynamic. It can be buried until we are hit by a devastating blow to a family member. A debilitating disease or loss can bring to the surface patterns we have been challenged by our whole lives but so elusive that until forced by the challenge, we won’t live our own lives free of expectation to fulfill a role.

Maybe you know what it is like to grow up with an enthusiastic parent, gregarious and interested in you, promising you the moon and then not realizing that adults get busy, they forget they were talking to a very open and trusting child, wide-eyed innocent and full of hope and excitement, they drop the ball, tell the child I am too busy or worse, leave following life’s changes. Totally forgetting promises made.

There are patterns of the heart that can make us have self-doubt, closed to love, feelings of self-criticism, entitlement, taking life for granted, arrogance, and living full of judgment. If you notice that some of these traits have been holding you hostage, then I would love to introduce you to the antidote to these debilitating feelings. Cultivating an open heart needs to include these qualities, Trust, openness, love, gratitude, and Gongjing (True Respect)

Take a moment to just reflect on how much time is spent getting ahead of ourselves, rushing to the next distraction not even realizing it is an attempt to fix an empty feeling deep inside we don’t even stop to identify. Override becomes interpreted as normal life. We live in the future missing our lives completely. We think this activity or this person will head off the loneliness that may swallow us up if we stop and don’t fill every moment with attempts to solve a sense of separateness.